With so many families just starting their homeschool journeys, I thought I would take a a minute to take and talk to you guys about some things I wish I had known before we started our homeschooling journey almost 6 years ago. So not necessarily in any particular order, here are ten things I wish I would have known...
10. You Don't Have to Fit into a Specific Homeschool Style
When researching homeschooling, I was actually surprised to find out there where different styles of homeschooling. Didn't everyone hand there children a workbook and stand in front of the children at a chalkboard to teach them a lesson? But no, there were traditional homeschoolers, and and unit study-ers, and Charlotte Mason-ers, and montessori-ers, and even people called un-schoolers! Not only was it shocking, it was also very confusing.
I spend hours reading all the things, trying to pick my favorite style. Because I must fit in on of these boxes right? But I had a lot of trouble because there were features of each style that I really liked, but there wasn't one that was "the one".
I wish I known that it was okay to not fit it one box. I could take the parts I liked from each style and put them together to get OUR style. I use unit studies for just some topic. I could use not only traditional curriculum, but also montessori. It could take what I loved, and leave the rest. And that was A-OKAY!
9. Things are NOT Going to Go According to Plan
Let me say that again... Things are NOT. going. to. go. according. to plan. You can have the must beautiful lesson that you just know your children are going to love. And they are going to be so happy. And they will hate it!
Then you are going to plan to ready a book on women's suffrage over the course of a month and your children are going to beg you to keep reading after each chapter and your ware going to end of finishing the book in the first week and be scrabbling to find more information for your hungry learners.
You just don't know what is going to work and what is not until you try. So learning to be being flexible is so important. Which leads me to the next thing I wish I knew before starting to homeschool.
8. Child Led Learning is Invaluable
When they show interest, jump on it! They are going to learn so much more when they are interested in what they learning about. And the experience is going to be so much more enjoyable for everyone. The excitement in your child's eyes when they are excited to learn is enchanting!
So when you see something spark interest in your child, it's okay to push your plans aside for a little while and dive deep into what they want to learn about. You will get to your lesson plans eventually.
And on that note...
7. It's Okay to Take a Break!
Whether you are following an interest, or want to slip in a well timed topic (like a holiday or weather event), or your kiddos are sick, or your younger child needs some attention, or you have a busy week, or you just plain need a break... take it!
Burn out is real. Emotions are real. Relationship strain is real. There are going to be times where homeschool is not going to be your top priority. And that is OKAY!
Yes, educating your child ranks high on the list of important parent-hood responsibilities. But your relationship with your children is even more important. We all, adults and children alike, need mental health days... heck sometimes we need mental health weeks. So if you need the break take it. You can make up the time/lessons later when everyone is in a better place.
6. When Something Isn't Working, You Don't Have to Keep Doing It.
I feel like our generation (the Gen Xers) were drilled with a don't quit attitude. You made a commitment, so you most follow through. And while, yes, that is an important lesson to learn, it is also okay to say, "This isn't working. I need to try something new."
Just because you spent money on a curriculum, if it doesn't work for your homeschool, then it doesn't work for your homeschool. Plain and simple. You don't have to finish out the year something your child doesn't enjoy just because you bought it or planned it out.
And sometimes thing will work for a while and then all of the sudden they don't work anymore. Pull your best Marie Kondo, thank it for it's good times and let it go (or put it away for your next child to try).
5. Remember Your Why
There will be bad days! When I imagined our homeschool in the beginning, I imagined my daughter and I reading wonderful books, doing our lessons while she hung on my every word so excited to learn. Boy was I wrong. Many of our days the first 6 months of homeschooling ended with one of us in tears. She hated learning to read. Hated it! I would push her, and she would fight me every step of the way.
But then I remembered why we wanted to homeschool in the first place. It wasn't so she could learn to read. It was because we wanted to raise a critical thinker who would be excited about learning. That was not what was happening. So we took a break from reading. We focused on math and science which she loved. We did more read alouds and played more games. And then one day she was sitting next to me and asked me why something said something. And while I don't remember what she read, I remember the complete shock I was in that she had actually just read something all on her own. Then we would be reading a book and she would ask to read the next page. She learned to read when she was ready!
That is one of the greatest lessons I have learned as a homeschooler. They will learn when they are ready to learn. Which leads me to my next point...
4. Homeschooling Should Meet the Child Where They Are
Even though I still use a grade level term for my girls (it's just easier when someone asks what grade they are in and they have a number), we don't really stick to curriculum on any certain grade level. One of the most wonderful benefits of homeschool is learning can go at the child's pace. If get the concept of nouns after the first lesson you move on. If they need more time learning to distinguish between adjective and and adverb, that is fine too.
You don't have to waste time reviewing something the already know, which is why you will find that a good amount of homeschool students are "ahead" in grade level. But if they need the time, take it! Which is my next point...
3. There Is No Such Thing As Behind
If your child's age is 6th grade, but they are using a 5th grade curriculum for math. They are not behind. They are right were they need to be.
But also, there is no such thing as being behind in in the day to day sequence of homeschool. Just because you planned out a lesson for Monday and you don't get to it until Thursday, you are not behind. Your children are not going to suffer an damage because you didn't read all 3 chapters you had planned. They might be upset (and not learn a darn thing) if they are feeling forced to keep reading when they are ready to be done for the day.
I struggled with this for MANY years! It was really hard for me to not get everything checked off my list for the day. But that was my problem, and not what my kids needed. So I learned ways to make my "check-list" easier to adjust. I not only reduced my own stress, I reduced my children's by being more flexible with our time table.
I started by only planning one week at a time. Next, I ditched my paper planner and switched to a post-it note system. And now I've even go digital with my older daughter. With these systems it is easy to pick up a lesson and move it to the next day. That way I am able to fill like my checklist was completed, and we are not stressed about what didn't get done.
2. Things Don't Have To Be Perfect
Even though you see these beautiful, perfect lessons posted on social media, I guarantee you there are at least 5 that didn't go that perfectly that they didn't post about. And you know what, that is just fine! We do not learn from getting everything right, we learn from getting things wrong.
So I don't want my homeschool to be perfect. I want us to make mistakes so my kiddos can see that it is okay to say, "Well that didn't work. Let me try again." I want my kiddos to learn how to take something and make it better. And they will never learn that if everything we do is "perfect". Life is messy. We mess up all the time. And especially in the world we live in now, my kids need to know that perfect is unrealistic!
1. Every Homeschool is Different!
And finally, every single homeschool is going to look different. Even if two families both follow a unit study approach, they are going to learn topics in a different order. Heck, even if two families follow the same exact curriculum, one family might be morning people and the other family is going to prefer doing school in the afternoons.
Don't compare your homeschool to other. Do what work for your family. The most beautiful thing about homeschool is the freedoms it provides for your family. What you do and how you do is the right way. If it is working for you, keep doing it. If it's not, don't. Take your lead from your children. Do what makes you guys happy. I promise the more relaxed and happy you guys are, the better your homeschool with be.
So I'm dying to know, what is something you wish you knew before you started homeschool? Please comment bellow.
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